The week after

I really appreciate all of the well wishes and prayers that were sent my way the week after the babies arrived, when I was admitted back into the hospital for some post delivery issues. I had something called HELLP Syndrome. I had never heard of it before, and never experienced any of these issues with past pregnancies. Below are the details of the syndrome, copied from healthline.com.

HELLP syndrome is a condition that can develop in pregnant women. It includes:

• hemolysis
• EL: elevated liver enzymes
• LP: a low platelet count

Hemolysis refers to a breakdown of red blood cells. Specifically, red blood cells get broken down earlier than normal. Hemolysis can lead to anemia, a condition in which your blood does not have enough oxygen to supply your body.

Elevated liver enzymes indicate that your liver is functioning poorly. When liver cells are inflamed or injured, they leak abnormally high amounts of certain chemicals, including enzymes, into your blood.

Platelets are part of the blood that helps it clot. When they are low, you are at risk for excess bleeding.

HELLP syndrome usually occurs in the last trimester of pregnancy, before the 37th week. It is a major health concern because it can be fatal to both mother and unborn baby. Prompt treatment and delivery of the baby are generally required for the best outcome. However, about a third of HELLP cases occur after the baby is born in the first week after delivery (Padden, 1999).The syndrome’s cause is unknown. Some experts believe it is related to preeclampsia, another pregnancy complication, which causes high blood pressure.

When I left the hospital the Sunday after the girls were born, I had instructions to call the doctor's office every day to report my blood pressure, because it had been elevated throughout the last couple weeks of pregnancy, and I still had a lot of edema in my lower legs and feet. When I called the doctor's office on Wednesday, the blood pressure wasn't getting any better, the swelling was worse, and I had started to show other symptoms that concerned Dr. Lepi, so he told me to come in that day to see him. After seeing me in the office, he gave me a baby aspirin and sent me straight to the hospital to be admitted and ordered an MRI, CT scan, EKG, and bloodwork. Needless to say, I had a couple of panic attacks that day. Thank goodness for Craig, Xanax, and Dilaudid - all of which helped tremendously. :) I was put on a magnesium drip to keep me from having seizures, which created terrible headaches, so I was kept on Dilaudid for most of Wednesday and Thursday to help with pain. I was on blood pressure meds when I was admitted, but they were increased from 100mg twice daily to 400 mg. twice daily while trying to get it under control. Luckily, my bloodwork showed improvement each time it was taken, and my edema started to get better by Friday evening. I was on a wonderful liquid diet since there was a risk of seizures and aspiration - so the plus side of my hospital stay was that it was a great weight loss starter! I've lost 45 pounds since April 25th! Not the way I would recommend losing it, but a good start anyway. :) Dr. Lepi had promised me that he would do his best to get me out of there by Saturday afternoon, so that I could be home to see Lauryn go to her Senior Prom. Luckily, my bloodwork and edema looked a lot better, and although my blood pressure wasn't back to normal, it was going in the right direction. I left with orders to take it easy for a while, get lots of rest, and call every other day with blood pressure readings. So...I went home and helped Lauryn get ready for Prom, went and took pictures, and sat and watched the kids all go in on the red carpet. After that - I DID rest! 

When I took my blood pressure the Monday after prom, it was still pretty high, and I was nervous to call the doctor's office. When Jami answered, I told her, "I'm going to tell you the truth about what my blood pressure is, but tell him I'm not coming in!" Thank goodness, he expected it to take time to go down, so he didn't need to see me. I really love the staff at Dr. Lepi's office, and I love the nurses and staff at Genesis, but I didn't want to see them again so soon. My blood pressure has continued to get better and I'm now down to 200 mg of medicine twice a day. Hopefully, I will be off of it by the time I have my six week check up. I'm still napping a lot throughout the day, and have a little cramping still, but I feel worlds better! Craig has been a fantastic home health nurse and has spoiled me quite a bit getting me back to good health. I plan to keep nursing that as long as possible. 

I've gotten questions about how the girls are doing and how Marc and Michael are doing with them. The girls saw their pediatrician in Atlanta and they are doing excellent! They are gaining weight and are healthy and strong. Michael had a bout of illness a few days after they returned home and was quarantined away from the babies for about a week, so Marc got to experience parenthood by himself with newborn twins for several days. He was exhausted, but got through it! Now, they are both back in the game and are both exhausted. :) They are head over heels in love, of course! You've seen these beauties, right??? How could you not fall in love with them?!? Every time I get a new picture of them I think - I have got to get a plane ticket right now and go see them! I miss them! Which leads to the next question I've gotten a lot - How do you feel now that they are in Atlanta? 

I am emotional, and I've always been a crier. I cry at commercials, TV shows and movies, songs, when I read inspirational quotes, when my students leave on the last day of school, when I think about my kids growing up too fast, etc. Really, I cry at anything that makes me sad, mad, anxious, or really happy. So, I had a few crying spells during the first days after the girls were born. They were happy tears, full of emotion seeing that this journey had ended with two amazing little girls in the arms of two amazing men, and because I was so grateful to have the support of a loving husband, family, and friends through it all. It was an emotionally overwhelming event overall. I did have a pretty difficult morning the Wednesday after they were born. It was a combination of things. I still wasn't feeling great (that's the afternoon I was re-admitted to the hospital), the hormones were still all out of whack, Craig had returned to work and the girls were at school so I was home alone, the excitement of everything was over and it was that let down kind of like the blues after you get back from a great vacation, and I knew they were leaving Thursday and I wouldn't get to see them again for a while. You know how you have those friends or relatives that live far away and come for a visit- then when they leave, everyone cries because you won't see each other for a while again, and you know you'll miss them. It's that feeling, amplified with post-partum hormones. We also have those relatives that make us cry when they arrive to visit, but that's a different emotion altogether. ;) 

Other than that small breakdown, I haven't had any real emotional issues. However, I have plenty of other things to be an emotional mess about. I'm terribly torn up over the fact that Lauryn is graduating and Lily is turning 7 both on the same day -May 31st. They truly grow up way too fast! I will be a mess at graduation. I'm looking for a super duper waterproof mascara, so if anyone has any suggestions, please let me know! I'm thinking maybe sunglasses are the way to go, actually. 

I will continue to update the blog periodically. If you have any questions, let me know. I know that Marc and Michael have plans to do some posts soon. I don't know what's taking them so long. ;) I'm sure those angelic girls aren't keeping them too busy. 

The surrogacy journey is over, and I'll always treasure the time the girls spent with me, close to my heart. But a new journey is just beginning for Kate and Eliza and their Daddy and Papa. I look forward to watching them grow up, seeing their personalities emerge, and listening to the stories Marc and Michael will have to tell. Our families will forever share a bond, and we will always treasure that special connection.